I'll Stand Up With You Forever
by aedy
Summary: When Kurt had figured out that he was gay, he knew that it was going to be hard to be happy in that little town. He just never really understood how much until he started having feelings for his bully.


Title: I'll Stand Up With You Forever  
>Pairing: PuckKurt  
>Genre: Romance, Angst<br>Notes: This starts in season 1 and ends after season two's end, but with no spoilers from season 2. Story wrote for the Song Challenge porcelain_fans  
>Words Count: 7630<br>Betareader: sunshine_flying  
>Summary: When Kurt had figured out that he was gay, he knew that it was going to be hard to be happy in that little town. He knew that it was going to be hard, he just never really understood how much until he started having feelings for the boy that shoved him into lockers and called him names.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>I.<strong>

_When I see your smile_

_tears run down my face_

_I can't replace_

When Kurt had figured out that he was gay, he knew that it was going to be hard to be happy in that little town. He dreamed of getting away, he dreamed of guys that would sweep him off his feet. He knew that it was going to be hard, he just never really understood how much until he started having feelings for the boy that shoved him into lockers and called him names.

The first time Kurt really noticed Noah "Puck" Puckerman, noticed him besides the "_you're a bully,_" he was fourteen and high school had just started. He was waiting for the bus because his father was working, and he was leaning against the wall of the bus shelter listening to a song on his iPod.

Suddenly, he felt a shiver running up his spine, his hands became sweaty and his mouth dry. He thought that he was going to faint and he wondered if you could have a heart attack at fourteen then the bus was suddenly there and he made himself get up the stairs and took his usual place next to the window. When the bus started, he glanced back at the bus shelter and saw that Puck was sitting on the ground with his back against the wall of the shelter on the outside of where Kurt had been leaning. He paled and ordered to himself not to let his hormones make him develop a crush on his tormentor.

Except that he then found out that he couldn't help it. After that afternoon, his eyes followed Puck whenever he walked into a room or in the cafeteria at lunch. He joined the glee club of Mr. Ryerson just so he would have something on his mind besides the football jock that met him every morning to throw him into a dumpster. But that really didn't work out.

Whenever Puck grabbed him to throw him in the dumpster, Kurt told himself that he should hate the boy each morning a little bit more, but the only thing his body wanted to feel was the strong chest against his back, the arms that slid across his chest and pulled him up like he weighted nothing. When he was fifteen, he started to fantasize about what would feel like if he'd lean against that chest for other reasons, how it would feel if those arms slid around him to pull him closer and not to throw him up in the air.

At sixteen Kurt lost hope of forgetting Puck before high school was over and he'd never have to see the jock again. He saw Puck going from one girl to another, he became friend with Tina and Mercedes thanks to Mr. Ryerson's glee club, and started to pretend to have a life where Puck would never be able to enter. Except that every song would make him think of Puck, and all the boys in the club would make him wonder what would feel like dancing with Puck.

He never told anyone about his crush, because Tina would probably have some romantic ideas where he'd get Puck in the end, and because Mercedes would call him crazy.

When Mr. Ryerson got fired and Mr. Shue opened the new glee club, Kurt lost his safe place because suddenly Rachel Berry was there, Finn Hudson was there, the Cheerios were there and Puck was there, always looking at Quinn, smiling at Rachel, flirting with Santana...

He saw how Puck's eyes would linger on Quinn and he hated the blond Cheerleader for being the one that made Noah Puckerman fall in love. Then Kurt remembered that you were supposed to want the people you loved happy even though they weren't happy with you, and he told himself to grow up because he'd never be the person Puck would look at in a room, he'd never been the one Puck would tell 'I love you' and he told himself to be happy for Puck because he loved Puck and he wanted him to be happy.

And if every time he saw Puck kissing Santana in the halls and look at Quinn with love, and Kurt's eyes stung from the tears, he never said anything because sometimes he was happy to be able to love Puck even though Puck would never love him back, because it seemed like no one wanted to love Puck, and Kurt could love him for all the ones that hated him.

**II.**

_I have figured out  
>How this world turns cold<br>and it breaks through my soul_

Kurt was walking down the halls when Mercedes appeared out of nowhere, grabbed his arm and dragged him towards the nearest girls bathroom.

"Mercedes?" he asked while the girl checked every stall to make sure that no one was there.

"I have to tell you something." She walked closer to him and leaned forward, her eyes sparkling with the amusement of having something to gossip about. "You know how I have the glee assignment with Puck, right?"

Kurt nodded trying not to show his sadness.

Mercedes frowned for a moment, forgetting temporarily about the news. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. So, what did you have to tell me?"

"Right." She smiled again and said, "He just told me that Quinn's baby is not Finn's."

Kurt's eyebrows shot up and for a moment he really wanted to know because his life was boring like that, that he had to live vicariously through other people's lives.

"Then who's the baby daddy?"

"You won't believe it. It's like right out of a soap-opera." She looked around even though the place was empty and then lowered her voice. "It's Puck."

For a moment, Kurt just stood there, his mouth open and his mind blank. Then he shook his head and tried to smile. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Yeah. He just told me. I found Tina before I found you so I told her first, but then I came to look for you right away. Can you imagine what Finn would say if he found out that Puck got his girlfriend knocked up?"

Mercedes turned around and walked over to the mirror to check her hair and missed the pained look that was Kurt's face. He was feeling like he had just been bitch-slapped by reality. He cleared his throat and gripped the strap of his shoulder bag tightly. "I have to go."

Mercedes nodded and Kurt quickly slipped out of the bathroom.

He had known that his crush on Puck was hopeless. After all, Puck hated him and that should have been a reason enough to know that he was never going to get the boy he loved, but he had always kept dreaming about them together.

He had read so many teen books where if the girl loved the boy hard enough then she would get the him in the end, he even saw it countless of times in movies, but he wasn't a girl and he should have realized before that he stood no chance. Maybe, if he had been able to be real about his feelings for Puck, if he had been able to convince himself that it was useless to keep hoping to have the jock returning his love, then perhaps he wouldn't feel so shattered now.

Because Quinn was carrying Puck's baby and that would only make Puck love her more. He could picture them together and maybe they'd have a little girl with Quinn's soft blond hair and Puck's hazel eyes. Kurt felt tears welling up in his eyes and he lowered his head trying to walk through the students without letting anyone notice that he was practically crying. Then he walked right into someone and he would have fallen on his ass if it wasn't for the strong hands that closed around his shoulders and steadied him.

He felt shivers spreading through his body from where the hands touched him and he didn't have to look up to know that he had just ran into Puck.

"Sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going," Puck said and Kurt was surprised that he would actually apologize and he made the mistake of looking up.

"I..." the words died on his lips when he saw Puck frowning at him and he suddenly became aware of the tears sliding slowly down his cheeks. He quickly pulled away from Puck's touch and called himself crazy for wasting his only chance at having the boy's hands on him for comfort instead than for hurting.

"Are you OK?" Puck asked and Kurt wanted to laugh in his face because it wasn't fair that Puck was acting like this now when he had just finally realized that he was never going to get him.

"Everything's perfect," he replied in his bitchy tone because if there was something that Kurt knew how to do, was how to put up a show.

"Dude, you're like crying and..."

"None of your business, Puckerman." He made himself walk away and not turn around even when he could feel Puck's eyes boring into his back. He wiped angrily at the tears on his cheeks and wanted to slap himself for crying in front of the boy he loved. He walked straight into the choir room and hid there until it was time for glee.

**III.**

_I will never let you fall_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all_

Kurt looked through the items in the shopping bag once again to check that he hadn't forgotten anything before heading back to his SUV. He was humming softly the song that he had just heard in the grocery shop when he glanced to the other side of the parking lot and saw Puck's truck parked in front of a convenience shop.

He wasn't sure sure why, but something was telling him to go over there, it was possible that it would have ended with him being insulted but he could never just walk away from Puck, he had never been able to, not even a year after Puck got Quinn knocked up.

When Kurt was close enough to the truck, he saw that Puck was drinking. Frowning, he walked up to the passenger side and knocked on the window, he noticed that there were empty cans scattered all around the car. After Quinn had given away Beth, Puck had tried to revert back to his old self but it hadn't actually worked and now they were stuck with a Puck that half the time was a jackass and half the time was a great guy and Kurt still had to stop himself from loving both sides.

Puck looked at him scowling before yelling, "What the fuck do you want?"

Kurt rolled his eyes because sometimes Puck really was predictable. Instead of answering, he opened the door, pushed the empty cans from the seat onto the floor and then got inside, closing the door with a loud bang.

"What are you doing?"

"This car stinks," Kurt said with a grimace. He felt something digging in his back and reached around pulling an empty can of beer. He dropped it down along the others. "Are you planning on getting drunk and then crush into a tree? And they call _me_ a drama queen."

"Hummel," Puck's voice was threatening, "get the hell out."

Kurt looked at him with an expression that clearly said 'so not impressed,' and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Do you really think that after all these years I'm scared of you, Puck?"

"Look, just get out, OK?"

Kurt was surprised when Puck's voice came out sounding tired because that was a reaction he wasn't expecting and he had to stop himself from reaching out to place a comforting hand on the boy's shoulder. He sighed again and then looked away from Puck's vulnerable eyes. "What happened?"

"Like you give a shit," Puck replied with sarcasm.

"Well, maybe we're not friends, but I'm the only one here, so you can talk to me, or send me away and keep going with your pity party."

Long moments of silence filled the truck and, just to fill it, Kurt started kicking the empty cans with his foot. He was sure that Puck wasn't going to talk, but at least, he still had to ask Kurt to leave again, so Kurt told himself that he'd wait, after all, he was used to that.

"I have some troubles with my mom," Puck finally said. He kept looking out of the windshield but felt Kurt's eyes turning on him.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Puck shrugged before leaning his head against the headrest. "Not really."

"OK," Kurt kicked a can again before saying, "So what were you doing here? And how did you get the beers?"

"I know the guy in the shop. I go inside, buy some shit and then I get out. After a few minutes, he goes out from the backdoor and leaves me a pack of beers."

"Oh. That explains a lot," Kurt shook his head with a small smile tagging at his lips. "Is this how you got Quinn drunk?"

Puck laughed shaking his head. "Man I only gave her wine coolers and who gets drunk with those?"

"I wouldn't know. After drinking April's alcohol, I kind of decided to be sober for the rest of my life."

Puck turned his head around and his eyes were curious and studious when they rested upon Kurt. "You know what, Hummel?"

Kurt leaned his head back against the headrest and turned to look at Puck. "What?"

"You should loosen up a bit."

Kurt chuckled and found himself unable to look away. He felt his heart starting to race and wondered when he'd get over his stupid crush.

Then Puck broke the eye-contact and bent down to get a new can of beer that he handed over to Kurt. "Just one sip."

Kurt shook his head. "No way."

"C'mon, it's just beer. You have to drink a few of these to start getting a little tipsy."

Laughing Kurt swapped Puck's hand away when the boy tried to shove the can under his nose. "I said no. I came here to talk you out of whatever stupid thing you wanted to do. I have no intention of letting you drag me along."

Puck stopped trying to get Kurt to drink. He lowered his hand and his lips curved into a half smile that was bitter and cold and Kurt realized that perhaps, he had made a bad choice of words but then he called himself stupid because why should Puck care about anything Kurt said?

"So, you never told me…what are you doing here besides trying to get drunk?"

"I was hoping to get drunk enough to stop thinking rationally. Then I'd drive the truck through the window of the shop and get myself sent to juvie."

Kurt laughed before noticing that Puck was being serious. The laughter quickly died away and he reached out, hand gripping Puck's wrist to stop him from opening the can of beer. "You're not serious, are you? Tell me you're joking."

Puck stared at Kurt's hand for a moment before slowly raising his gaze until he was looking straight into Kurt's eyes. Kurt tightened his hold and Puck finally lowered the beer. "I'm joking," he finally said and Kurt knew that he was lying.

"Don't do it," Kurt's voice was quiet and full of worry and he saw the surprise cross Puck's eyes. "Whatever happened, it's not worth it and we need you, at Glee, we can't lose a member, you know that." He had to choke back the '_please I need to know that you'll be alright._'

Puck nodded. "Right, the glee club needs me."

Kurt nodded back and as if only in that moment realizing that he was still holding Puck's wrist, he released his hold and cleared his throat. "Yeah, we do." He looked away and gripped tightly the handle of the door. "And if you get sent to juvie, you may not get into a college and..."

Puck laughed bitterly. "You really think that I could get into a college? C'mon, what did you call us? Oh right, Neanderthals."

"You've changed."

"And yet here I am. Drinking myself stupid so then I can crush a stupid shop window."

"But you're not going to do it anymore." Kurt was resolute. He pushed back his own feelings and looked straight into Puck's eyes. "Stop being pathetic, Puckerman. It's always easier to be the person everyone expects you to be than follow your own road. So, are you man enough to be a better person? Because I saw you being that person and..." His voice quivered and he had to look away, to stop himself from saying something like '_I love that person_.' "And it would be a waste to just keep being the jackass we all know." He took a deep breath and looked back at Puck. "If you do this, then it's fairly sure that whatever your mother told you, will be true. I know that Quinn called you a Lima loser once, and here's your chance to prove them wrong."

He fumbled with the door's handle trying to get out as quickly as he could. He was frustrated and was feeling like the car was closing in on him. He pulled the handle but the door didn't open and he was about to kick it open when he felt Puck's breath on his neck and then an arm reached around him to open the door for him.

"It gets stuck sometimes," Puck said and Kurt closed his eyes for a moment willing himself not to lean back.

He felt his mouth going dry and gave a nod of thanks before quickly getting out of the car. He was closing the door when Puck said, "Kurt?"

He looked at him surprised at hearing his first name. "What?"

"Thanks."

Kurt nodded and turned around and told himself that he couldn't run to his car.

**IV.**

_Seasons are changing  
>And waves are crashing<br>And stars are falling all for us  
>Days grow longer and nights grow shorter<br>I can show you I'll be the one_

Kurt was in the bathroom putting on his eyeliner and singing "Time Warp" when the door opened and closed. Through the mirror, he saw Puck leaning against the door and staring at him. He put down the eyeliner and turned to look at him.

"Is there something you wanted?"

Puck shook his head and for a few minutes didn't say anything. Then, he stepped away from the door and took a step forward. "I didn't crush the window."

"Yeah, I noticed it." He turned around again and started adjusting the bald cap on his head. Then he picked up the eyeshadow to finish his make-up. He was trying to hide his nervousness because he wasn't used to be in a room alone with Puck. Sure at glee they sat next to each other from time to time, but they weren't friends and they didn't hang out together so there were always other people.

His hand shook and the brown eyeshadow got all over his eye. He felt the sting of having the chemical powder in his eye and started rubbing his eye furiously. He knew that he wasn't supposed to do it because it was only going to make things worse, but he couldn't help himself.

Then he felt a hand closing around his wrist and tagging his hand away. He looked up at Puck and found his vision blurred by the tears.

Puck opened the faucet and put his hand under the spray before starting to wipe at Kurt's eye. There was an amused smirk on his lips and Kurt couldn't look away from that mouth even though his right eye was red and full of tears.

"I thought that you'd be a pro with make-up and all that girly stuff."

"It's not like I spend all my time putting make-up on," Kurt replied annoyed. "I'm not a girl."

"You said you were an honorary girl."

"Whatever." He huffed and tried to get Puck's hand away from his face but Puck ignored him keeping to put water in his eye. Then Kurt realized that his shirt was getting soaked. "Damn."

"I wanted to ask you to bend over so I could put your face under the spray and save your shirt, but I wasn't sure about how you were going to react to that."

Kurt slapped him in the chest, hard, and Puck massaged the offended part with a scowl. "I was kidding. Geez, Hummel, you really have to loosen up a bit."

"Whatever."

Puck rolled his eyes. "Is that your favorite come back or something?"

Kurt didn't answer him. Instead, he looked at himself in the mirror and grimaced. The make-up was now smeared all over his face. "Couldn't you wait to come talk to me? I don't need to have my hands shaking when I have a sharp objects near my eye." His stopped when he realized what he had said. He dared to glance at Puck and found him looking at him questioningly. He tried to slip his uncaring mask back up and said, "Anyway, you wanted to let me know you didn't get your ass landed in juvie so you can go now."

"Was that your way of telling me that I made you nervous?"

"Of course you make me nervous. Last time we were alone in a bathroom, I had to tell you that I was allergic to water to stop you from putting my head in the toilet," he said, because lying was easy.

Puck's eyes turned cold. "Right. I'm still your bully." He shook his head and turned to leave and Kurt had never felt worse in his life.

"Wait. I'm sorry."

"You just told the truth."

"Yeah but I also told you that you have changed and I should remember it."

Puck shrugged like it wasn't a big deal but Kurt could see that it was all a facade. He knew all about putting up masks for other people. He cleared his throat before speaking again. "If you feel like driving through a window ever again, come find me, ok? I may talk you out of doing stupid things."

Puck barely nodded before exiting the bathroom and Kurt really wanted to smack himself.

After the debacle in the bathroom, Kurt really wasn't surprised that Puck didn't come to talk to him again. They went on with their lives like they had never talked in that parking lot, like Kurt had never offered his help in that bathroom and Puck had never gone looking for him.

New Directions went through Sectionals and Regionals and got to Nationals for the first time in McKinley's history since the time when Mr. Shue and Bryan Ryan had been in the glee club. There they went up against Vocal Adrenaline and came in second. They were all sad about losing, but they got their confidence back enough to hope that 3rd year was going to be the charm.

When school ended, they all made plans for the summer, scheduled meetings and Rachel even convinced them to meet a few times to rehears for the next year. However, what really made that summer different was one night, one week after the school's end.

Kurt was home alone. Burt was out with Carole and Finn was over at Rachel's. He was relaxing when the doorbell rang.

When he opened the door, he found himself looking at Puck. He just stood there staring at Puck for a few moments before finally finding his voice again. "Finn is not here," he said.

Puck nodded. "Yeah I know. I called him before coming over."

"Then what are you doing here?"

Puck took a deep breath. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah sure." Kurt moved aside letting Puck walk inside before closing the door. "Do you want something to drink?"

"No. I... I just..." Frustrated, Puck closed his hands into tight fists and looked determined at Kurt. "You told me to come to you if I ever wanted to drive through a window again so..."

"What happened?" Kurt cut in. "Did you fight with your mother again?"

Puck nodded and Kurt sighed. He grabbed Puck's sleeve and started to drag him upstairs. "I have the new "Assassins". Well, Finn does, I only steal it from him when he's not home."

He led Puck inside his bedroom and tossed at him a control before re-starting the game. "I was playing when you rang the doorbell." He sat down on the floor with his back against the bed and looked up at Puck raising an eyebrow. "So? Do you want to play?"

Feeling a little uncertain, Puck nodded and sat down next to him. "I didn't know you played video games."

"Yep. I bet no one knows a lot about me. You all just see the fancy clothes and that's okay," Kurt said keeping his eyes on the screen. "That's all I want you to see."

Puck glanced at him for a moment because they had just started playing and Kurt was already kicking his ass so he really needed to pay attention. However, he was curious because Kurt always surprised him. He was able to show kindness even to the least deserving person and Puck didn't know anyone else like that. "Why?"

Kurt shrugged biting his lower lip in concentration. "Because I want you all to believe that I have a lot of self-confidence." His hands stilled around the control and he closed his eyes. "I so didn't mean to tell you that."

Puck remained silence for a few moments before saying, "My mom told me that I'll end up in jail as soon as I'm out of high school because I'm just like my father. Sometimes I think she's right."

Kurt wanted to look up at Puck and to tell him that his mother wasn't right, that he could be a great person and that he was already learning to be a better person, but he also knew that he had opened up to him so Kurt wouldn't feel vulnerable for having let slip that information about himself, so he knew that he wasn't supposed to comment about what Puck had just said. He cleared his throat and looked at the screen. "Maybe we should start again."

"Yeah, we should."

They kept playing until Burt and Carole came back and Burt told Puck that it was late and he could sleep over. Finn came back too and for a while took Kurt's place at playing the game but then Kurt kicked both boys out because he wanted to get some sleep. When he told good night to them, he wasn't expecting to hear Puck saying, "'night Kurt." He fell asleep still smiling.

After that night, Puck started coming over almost every day even when he hadn't had a fight with his mother. Truth to be told, he started going over at the Hummel's so he wouldn't get into another fight with his mother and Kurt never asked any question.

They would watch a movie, play a game, sometimes with Finn and sometimes just the two of them. And sometimes they let slip something. Kurt told Puck that he liked helping his father in the shop more than singing at Glee lately, and Puck told Kurt that he wanted to get into a college but that perhaps it was too late for thinking about that.

Without neither one of them really noticing, they slipped into a friendship and Kurt fell even more in love with Puck every time he saw the real Noah and whenever he caught the boy staring at him, he stopped himself from blushing and starting to daydream all over again.

One night, on the 10th of August, Kurt was already in bed when he felt his phone buzzing. For a moment, he considered not answering, but then he sighed, got out of bed and walked over to the desk. Picking up his phone, he saw that he had a new message from Puck.

"_Come outside_"

Frowning down at the phone, he almost sent a message back to ask Puck what he wanted, but the he changed his mind. Slipping his flip-flops on, he quietly walked downstairs, checked to make sure that Burt and Carole weren't there and then slipped outside.

He turned around to lock the door and yelped when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Shit, you'll get us busted."

Kurt turned around with his hand on his heart. "Are you trying to kill me, Puckerman?"

Puck rolled his eyes. "Drama queen, much?"

Glaring at the boy, he asked, "What do you want?"

Puck grabbed his hand and started to lead him away. "Puck, where..."

"Shut up and follow me ok?" But then Puck stopped and looked at him for a few seconds before asking, "Do you trust me?"

"Yeah, of course I do," Kurt answered right away and Puck smiled at him.

"Good. Now, shut up." Quickly, Puck leaded him towards his truck, made Kurt climb inside and then turned it on. "I'm taking you to see something."

"Am I supposed to just follow you without asking questions?"

"Yep."

And the little smile that was curing Puck's lips was enough to convince Kurt to keep quiet and just let Puck drive them wherever it was that he wanted to take Kurt. Over the course of the last two months, Kurt had wondered what the hell was going on between them, but he didn't want to ask Puck why he was suddenly spending almost every day with him because he was so desperately in love with him, that he was even settling for just being a friend and he liked being Puck's friend.

If when he was fourteen someone would have asked him if he'd be ok with just being friends with the boy he loved, he would have said no because he wanted everything with Puck, but now he was seventeen and he had gotten used of loving meaning being there for the person you love in whatever way that person needs you. There still were the times when he wanted to believe that he could have a chance with Puck; he still dreamed about getting his first kiss from him, but he knew that it was never going to happen and he had actually gotten used to it, it had stopped hurting because now he knew how to live with it.

He almost didn't notice when Puck parked the truck. They were on a hill overlooking the whole Lima and they were far away enough from the city that the sky was darker because the lights of the city didn't reach that place.

Puck got out of the truck and Kurt did the same. "Where are we?"

"What does it look like?" Puck asked sarcastically before using the window to climb on the roof of the truck.

"What are you doing?"

"Get your ass up here."

Kurt huffed and almost told him to forget it, but then Puck was looking at him from over the roof smiling and was extending him a hand. "C'mon, Kurt."

And pretending to be doing something he hated, Kurt slid his hand into Puck's and climbed on the roof. Puck leaned back until he was lying down and Kurt did the same. There really wasn't a lot of space but Kurt tried to keep his distance from Puck. He was trying not to fall down when he felt a hand grabbing his arm to pull him closer.

"You're going to fall."

"I know but there isn't a lot of space."

"Which is why you shouldn't stand all the way to the edge."

Kurt sighed and looked up to the sky. "I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable."

Puck turned his head so he could look at Kurt's face even though the boy was looking up. "If I felt uncomfortable around you, then I wouldn't have asked you to sneak out of your house in the middle of the night and I wouldn't be lying with you on the roof of my truck."

Kurt laughed and turned to face Puck surprised to find the boy standing so close. It was dark and the only light was coming from the moon and the headlights of the old truck they were lying on. But Kurt could still see Puck's relaxed face and how open his eyes were and he felt himself relaxing against the cool steel of the roof.

He didn't want to look away first, not when he was finally having his chance at being like this with the boy he loved, and he was happy when Puck didn't break the eye contact either. He felt the hand around his forearm sliding down until it slipped in his and Kurt felt his heart starting to race.

"Look up," Puck whispered and Kurt wondered if he was imagining the husky tone of Puck's voice. "The stars, Kurt," Puck said, squeezing his hand. And Kurt looked up, confused, and after a few moments, a shooting star crossed the sky.

Kurt's lips curved into a big smile. "I have never seen a shooting star before."

"Tonight it's the night of the shooting stars. I thought you'd like to see them."

"I... thank you."

Another star crossed the sky and he squeezed the hand still resting in his and even though he could still feel Puck's gaze on him, he kept his eyes fixed to the sky even when Puck scooted closer until their shoulders were touching.

**V.**

_'Coz you're my true love,_

_my whole heart_

_please don't throw that away_

After that night spent watching the stars, Kurt started noticing how much more comfortable with him Puck was. Whenever they were watching a movie or playing a video game, Puck would sit so close to Kurt that their thighs were pressed together and when they went at Breadstix to eat, Puck would sit next to him instead of in front of him and Kurt hated how much he loved that change.

The last week of August came way too quickly for Kurt's liking; he was unsure of how their friendship was going to change when school started again. However, he wanted to enjoy as much of his time with Puck as he could, he was just grateful that Puck never mentioned girls, sex, cleaning pools or his cougars.

One particular night, Kurt was watching a movie with Finn when the doorbell rang. He pushed Finn with his foot. "Go see who is at the door."

Finn huffed and made no move to get up from the couch. "C'mon, we both know that at this time it can only be Puck. And he comes here for you so..."

"He's your best friend," Kurt commented but he was already getting up.

"Yeah but he never takes me out to dinner." Finn had a little grin on his face and looked at Kurt like he knew more than Kurt did. It was unnerving and Kurt glared at him before leaving the living room.

When he opened the door, Puck was leaning heavily against the door frame and had a bottle half empty in his left hand.

"What..."

"Can I come inside?"

Kurt sighed but moved to the side letting the other teen walk inside. Then he closed the door and pushed Puck towards the living room. Puck seemed to sober up for a moment when he saw Finn on the couch.

"Dude, are you drunk?" Finn asked looking away from the screen.

Puck narrowed his eyes but didn't answer, then, he turned around and started getting upstairs.

"Where are you going?" Kurt called after him.

"Bedroom," was the slurred reply.

"You better get some aspirin and a lot of water," Finn said before lying on the couch.

Without saying anything else, Kurt walked to the kitchen, got a bottle of water and then took form the bathroom an aspirin before going upstairs in his room.

"What happened this time?" he asked, walking inside his bedroom and closing the door behind him.

Puck was sitting on the edge of the bed, wearing only his undershirt and the jeans having already got rid of his t-shirt, shoes and socks. He looked up from the carpet when Kurt walked inside.

"Same old." Puck laid back down on the bed and closed his eyes listening to Kurt moving around the little room. He felt a cold hand resting on his forehead and opened his eyes finding Kurt hovering over him looking worried.

"You're burning."

"Because it's hot outside." He grabbed Kurt's wrist and tagged until Kurt let him pull him down on the mattress next to him.

"I left the aspirin on the nightstand along with a bottle of water. You better keep hydrated."

Puck turned on his side so he could look at Kurt. "You never ask me to have some stupid talk about feelings."

Kurt shrugged. "I may not be your best friend, Noah, but I can read you pretty easily. I can tell when you want to talk and when you just want someone next to you. And if you really wanted to talk, you would just do it with or without me asking you to pour your guts to me." He smiled a little before turning on his side so he was facing the wall.

"My mom got really drunk and thought I was my dad. She started yelling at me that I had stolen her life and that I left her with two stupid kids she didn't want in the first place."

Puck's voice was quiet in the silence of the room, but Kurt could hear Puck's pain. He didn't turn around before asking, "Do you still believe it when she tells you that you will end up being just like him?"

A few moments of silence went by before Puck sighed heavily and said, "Not anymore."

Then Kurt felt the mattress dipping and then an arm was sliding around his waist, pulling him back. "Can I stay?" Puck asked softly and if it wasn't for the last few months that Kurt had spent with Puck, he would have wondered who this boy so broken was because the Puck they all knew at school was a completely different person. But then again, Kurt knew all about splitting yourself in two.

"As long as you want," he finally said.

He felt Puck relaxing and after a few minutes, his breath evened out signaling that he had fallen asleep.

Kurt could feel Puck's breath caressing his neck and this time he didn't stop himself from leaning back. He snuggled up that warm chest and didn't care that it was August and it was so hot that not even a bath in iced water could cool you down.

He sighed contently and closed his eyes. His fingers started caressing the back of Puck's hand and then his fingers and he was so happy and relaxed, that at first he didn't notice when the fingers started moving against his until they slid through his.

Thinking that Puck was sleeping and probably dreaming of cuddling up with one of his girls, Kurt quietly said, "I wish we could always stay like this. Sometimes I just want to lock us in this room even though all we do is talking and playing stupid videogames because I..." he trailed off squeezing his his eyes shut. He couldn't bring himself to finish that sentence.

Sometimes, Kurt wanted to be strong enough to push Puck away because while being friends helped Puck, it also teared Kurt inside. It was like getting a taste of what he needed but being unable of getting the whole thing.

He was startled when the hand still holding his started to slide up his chest until Puck's palm was flat against his heart. Puck tightened his hold and then pulled back a little so, when he pushed, Kurt rolled on his back and was lying half under Puck.

Mindful of keeping their hands clasped together, Puck used his free hand as a leverage to pull himself up enough to be able to look down into Kurt's eyes.

"What are you doing?"

Puck just kept staring at him and Kurt was starting to feel nervous. He tried to free his hand from Puck's hold, but the boy wouldn't let him.

Kurt could feel Puck's breath ghosting over his mouth and all he managed to say was a strangled, "Noah..."

Puck took a deep breath and then leaned forward and Kurt finally understood what was going to happen. He turned his head to the side so Puck's lips collided with his cheek.

"Don't."

Puck sighed and leaned his forehead on Kurt's pillow so that their bodies were pressed from their chest to their feet.

"Kurt..."

"Don't you dare kiss me."

Puck squeezed the hand he was still holding. "Why?"

Swallowing around the lump forming in his throat, Kurt squeezed his eyes shut. "Because for you it wouldn't mean anything. You're vulnerable because of what happened with your mother and I'm just here and you always seek physical contact so for you it wouldn't mean anything but for me..." He trailed off and after a moment, he tried to squirm away from under Puck's body.

"Kurt, listen..."

"Let me go. I don't want you to kiss me."

"You do." Puck pulled up a little and used his free hand to grasp Kurt's chin to turn his head so they were facing each other. "Look at me," he demanded gently and when Kurt opened his eyes, Puck felt a shiver running up and down his spine at the intensity of that gaze.

"You can't kiss me, Noah." He paused and took a deep breath to steady his nerves. He wanted Puck to understand, so he quietly said, "Because I love you and you don't love me back and I don't want you to kiss me because it would mean too much for me but for you, it would mean nothing and I can't..."

"Do you really think that I'd just kiss you just because you're here and I want someone's body?"

Kurt could hear the hurt in Puck's tone and wondered what that meant. "I..."

"You're a boy and I'm Puck the same guy that used to shove you into lockers and throw you into dumpsters. Do you really think I'd kiss you without thinking, Kurt? I'm not that stupid." Then he lowered his head a little to hide his eyes from Kurt's sight. "I see the way you look at me. I know what you feel."

Kurt's eyes widened and he started again to try and push Puck away but Puck wasn't letting him go. "Can you stop for a minute?"

"Why are you saying these things?" Kurt asked, his voice sounding weak.

"Because I want you to know that I'm not playing any games here. Let me kiss you."

"No."

"It would mean something to me, Kurt. Probably more than it should but can we not think about that now?" He tried to smile to lighten the mood. "You're kind of killing the romance."

"Romance?" Kurt asked, smiling back despite himself.

"I was going to kiss you and beg you to give me a chance and you were going to say yes because I'm the hottest guy in town and..."

"Because I love you." He cut Puck off. "If I said yes, it would be because I love you, not because you're hot."

Puck's grin turned into a real smile one of those rare smiles that he used to give only to Quinn and Kurt felt his heart flutter in his chest; he felt like that day at the bus shelter.

"Can I kiss you, Kurt?"

Puck's voice was husky and his eyes glanced down at his lips and Kurt turned his hand that was still clasped with Puck, so Puck's fingers slid easily through his. "Just, don't go breaking my heart, please. Even if you kiss me and feel nothing, please don't be..." He was cut off when Puck's lips sealed with his.

_It's okay. _

_'Coz I'm here for you._

_Please don't walk away_

_and please tell me you'll stay_

_and I know I'll find deep inside me_

_I can be the one..._

**The End**


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